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03 Aug 2009 11:02 am

Righteous Rant Of The Day

This is the first I've heard of "fire-safe cigarettes" since I've never smoked tobacco. I have no idea how bad they taste, but my instinctive sympathy lies with this long-time reader (and one of my favorite emailers) about the fag-bashing (pardon my English) of the health and safety killjoys:

We Missourians who choose to smoke got our latest - and unspeakably vile - taste of this neo-totalitarianism which the Puritan killjoys Trojan-horsed into law: the so-called "Fire-Safe Cigarettes" that taste worse than shit. Actually they don't taste like shit, they taste like dirty pennies and burned plastic. This vile taste stays, it clings even after you brush your teeth, even after you've slept overnight and again brushed your teeth, and it sickens you to your stomach. There was just one diabolical purpose behind the Trojan horse "FSC" cigarette, and that was to enable the busy-bodies to reach beyond their already successful efforts to ban smoking in public places (and in some jurisdictions, even in citizens' own homes) to stick their foul killjoy hands, their very distaste for liberties they don't approve of, into the very mouths of people who choose to smoke.

I no longer enjoy living in and I no longer want to live in these United States.

I'd actually prefer to live in Red fucking China where you can at least buy a decent smoke instead of a cigarette that, well, doesn't smoke (you can't even call cigarettes "smokes" anymore) and that tastes like some mad cruel totalitarian alchemist's vile compound.

The killjoys have done their right-alienating job very well indeed: now they've reached their killjoy-fouled hands into people's formerly free mouths. All in the pursuit of uniformly super-efficient, completely infatilized, helpless, utterly dependent human bodies to serve the state as efficiently as they can be compelled to serve it. These new Puritans are also leading instigators among the people who will make Mammon-damned sure that pot is never decriminalized or legalized - after all, pot serves no efficient purpose, it doesn't promote uniformity or productivity, and - Heaven forfend - people might enjoy smoking it.

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