Robert Farley is dead on:
I read a lot of Savage in the 1997-2003 period, and it really, really seemed like much of his project was about convincing people that drag queens could be good Republicans, too. What I mean by this is that much of his writing and activism seems motivated by the idea of creating a standard nuclear family, with relatively standard ways of transmitting family mores, and simply substituting out some of the “traditional” members. Savage seemed enraged not by the notion of a “traditional” nuclear family, with pre-set roles and expectations, but by the idea that he should be excluded from this traditional vision. There’s some merit to that, of course, but it also reflects a certain comfort with a conservative vision of politics and family life.
Of course. That's why Dan was an early supporter of marriage equality and was a huge moral support in my own efforts to move the debate forward. What he really sees as the root of marital and relationship collapse is deception. It is lying to your spouse rather than dealing with reality. I've been around his family; it is as traditional as it is refreshing.
(Photo: Terry and DJ chilling on our deck in Provincetown a couple summers ago.)